Wednesday, April 20, 2016

Setea de a avea dreptate sau de ce problema ta e mai importanta decat cea a altcuiva / The thirst for being always right or why your problem is more important than someone else's

De foarte mult timp observ tot mai des o anumita trasatura, deloc placuta, in din ce in ce mai multe persoane, persoane care altminteri imi sunt pe plac si care m-au surprins neplacut sub acest aspect intrucat le atribuiam doar calitati. In viitor voi discuta si acest aspect al atribuirilor prost plasate deocamdata ma voi concentra asupra aspectului enuntat in titlu, setea de a avea mereu dreptate si convingerea ca problema ta e mai grava decat cea a altcuiva. Plec de la un aspect simplu si usor de cuantificat, nu am de gand sa dezbat probleme filosofice, cum ar fi de exemplu un loc de munca sau o rata de platit. Sa luam ca exemplu 2 persoane imaginare care au acelasi loc de munca, exista persoane mai rezervate care isi dau straduinta sa faca tot posibilul fara sa se planga si exista persoane care la fiecare propozitie adauga si niste consideratii care sa ilustreze inca o data dificultatea pe care o intalnesc. Aceste persoane sunt ferm convinse ca, desi munca este aceeasi, cumva, ceea ce trebuie sa faca ei este mai greu, altfel si cealalta persoana s-ar fi plans, asadar munca celeilalte persoane este mai usoara sau persoana respectiva are bafta si lucrurile ii merg bine pentru ca are noroc in timp ce ei trebuie sa munceasca mai mult iar atunci cand lucrurile se rezolva bine, acest lucru este datorat faptului ca sunt mai inteligenti, sau au muncit mai mult si nu pentru ca au avut noroc precum cealalta categorie de persoane. Calitati intrinseci de o parte si extrinseci de cealalta. Aceasta este o eroare de atribuire si desi am studiat acest aspect la universitate nimeni si nimic nu m-a pregatit sa infrunt o astfel de situatie, se vede ca in acest caz cunoasterea nu este totul :D Corelat acestei erori de atribuire am mai observat si un efect negativ al stimei de sine prea crescute aidoma unui soi de drept de casta. Dreptul de casta sau dreptul de nastere constituie convingerea unor persoane ca anumite lucruri li se cuvin in mod gratuit pentru ca sunt un soi de privilegiu care li se transmite din strabunici, pe linie sociala, nationala, etc si oricat o terta persoana s-ar stradui, prin munca, studiu, caracter, nu poate avea aceleasi drepturi pentru ca nu s-a nascut cu ele. Slava domnului ca aproape in toata lumea s-a abolit monarhia, aristocratia, s-a instaurat republica si democratia si s-au votat drepturile omului pentru ca altfel ce ne faceam cu cei ce aveau prin lege mai multe drepturi decat noi? Cu totii vrem sa fim egalii celor de sus si niciodata adusi la acelasi nivel cu cei sunt pe o treapta mai jos. 
Cu aceste consideratii va las sa reflectati la propria persoana si la modul in care atribuiti succesul vostru si lucrurile care vi se cuvin sau nu...


ENGLISH



For a very long time, I have been observing more and more often a certain trait, not at all pleasant, in more and more people, persons who otherwise I like and who have surprised me in this regard because I only attributed qualities to them. In the future I will also discuss this aspect of misplaced assignments but for now I will focus on the aspect enunciated in the title, the thirst for always being right and the conviction that your problem is more serious than someone else's. I will start from an aspect simple and easy to quantify, I do not intend to discuss philosophical issues, such as a job or the payment of a rate. Let's take as an example two imaginary people who have the same job, there are persons more reserved, who strive to do their best without complaining and there are people who add to each phrase some considerations that illustrate once more the difficulty they face. These people are firmly convinced that although work is the same, somehow, what they have to do is harder, otherwise the other person would complain too, so the other person's work is easier or the person was lucky and things go well because they have good luck while they have to work harder and when things work out well, this is because they are smarter, or they worked harder and not because they were lucky as the other category of people. Intrinsic qualities on one side and extrinsic on the other. This is an error of attribution and although I studied this aspect at the university nobody and nothing prepared me to face such a situation, as you can see, in this case knowledge is not everything: D Correlated to this error of attribution we also noticed a negative effect of a too elevated self-esteem, similar to a kind of caste right. The caste right or the right of birth is the conviction of some people that things are due to them for free like some kind of privilege that is passed to them from ancestors, on a social, or national line, etc., and no matter how much a third person endeavors through work, study, character, can not have the same rights because they were not born with them. Praise the Lord that the monarchy and aristocracy were abolished in almost the entire world, the republic and democracy were established, and human rights were voted for, otherwise what could we do with those who have more rights than we do by law? We all want to be equal to the ones above us and never brought to the same level as those on one level below. 
With these considerations, I will let you reflect on your own person and the way you attribute your success and the things that are due to you or not ...

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